Lauren Spangler. Age 10. Rather short, a little plump, strawberry blond hair, freckles, crooked teeth, and mean as a rattlesnake.

Her latest victim – my younger sister, Michelle.

Since they shared the same grade, they attended the same classes in church. For some reason, Lauren took it upon herself to start spreading lies about my sister and poking fun at her during any chance that presented itself.

I’d love to impress you and share how I, as the godly big sis, encouraged a Biblical response to my sister. But, alas, I wanted Michelle to ignore Lauren and run the other way. Much to my surprise, one Thursday afternoon I overhear my sister talking with my mom. “Are you sure?” my mom asks. “Yes, ma’am,” my sister replies. Within five minutes Michelle has hung up the phone with a smile on her face. “Lauren is coming over Sunday afternoon,” she states with a confident sweetness.

Sure enough, Sunday following church we all piled into our minivan, Lauren included! I don’t remember much about that afternoon other than all of us enjoying Sunday dinner around our dining room table, Lauren acting mannerly and answering our questions, and my sister sharing her toys and favorite places with this new found friend. All afternoon these ten year olds giggled and played the day away.

In the months and years that followed, Lauren and Michelle remained acquaintances, but they never became best friends. However, I know that the love and hospitality my sister shared squelched the meanness Lauren gave forever.

Hospitality – a word we often use to describe opening our home to friends, sharing a meal, and having Christian fellowship. But does hospitality begin when guests arrive at our door? How did Jesus, our ultimate example, the One we are to follow, show hospitality? I mean, he had no home or place to lay His head.

Matthew 9:36 speaks of Jesus looking with compassion on the multitudes. He saw individuals in need, people longing for love, and men and women searching for hope.  Jesus healed, fed, listened, and sought these souls. Shouldn’t we do the same?

Hospitality begins in our heart. When we look at others, do we see the outward appearances? Do we focus on the things that others may do that we would never participate in? Or, are we seeking to have a hospitable heart that welcomes and loves others? Are we remembering the love, patience, and compassion that Christ has shown us, and therefore sharing that hospitality with others? Do we really believe that all we own belongs to Christ? If so, we shouldn’t worry about how fancy our home may be, what types of dainty food we can afford, or if our children will act perfectly for company. When we trust Christ for all we call “ours”, how can we help but share those blessings with others?

Since hospitality begins in our heart, we need to spend ample amount of time praying for others and seeking to love those around us. Whether it’s a sweet couple from church or the annoying classmate that makes our life miserable, may our lives mirror the compassion of Christ and be hospitable to all those around us – even the Lauren Spanglers.

Monica is married to Matthew and has two adorable little girls Abigail and Aubrey. She can be found writing at A Godly Heritage.

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This post is linked up with Raising Homemakers

1. Adjustability

Thirsties Duo Wraps come in two sizes and both have the ability to be adjusted to fit your child as needed. This ability to customize the fit, minimized the amount of covers you need to buy and also cuts down on leaks caused by ill fitting covers.

2. Snaps

I am a big fan of snaps. Velcro gets old and yucky over time. It snags other diapers in the  wash. It loses it’s grippiness over time. Most importantly little, curious fingers can easily pull velcro diapers open. For all of these reasons I love the snap closers that Thirsties Duo covers use. Some people enjoy the ease of velcro for diaper changes. If this is you, Thirsties has a velcro option as well.

3. Gussets

At first I wasn’t sure about gussets. Do they really make a difference? Does that extra little piece of fabric around the thigh really make a difference? I have come to the conclusion that it does. Gussets really cut down on leaks because they provide a more natural fit that covers more of the prefold diaper.

4. Texture

I am big on texture. I hate the feeling of jeans under my fingers (though I struggle through it). The texture of seat belts is another one that really gets me. I know, I am very strange. All of this to say, texture can make or break a diaper for me. Thirsties Duo Wraps are soft, while at the same time do not absorb the wetness beneath, providing greater leak protection. Want to know a cover that does absorb wetness and leaks like crazy? Click here.

5. Design

Thirsties Duo Covers come in lots of adorable, bright colors, but I have bought all three of the cute (boy friendly) patterns they have available. There is no getting around how adorable these covers are!

Curious as to what I use underneath these covers? These prefolds (I use the unbleached option), these Snappis, and these liners. 

This post is linked up with Raising Homemakers

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Sunday our church was privileged to have Dr. Russell Moore from Southern Baptist Theological Seminary speak on the subject of adoption. This was more than a conference on the Christian’s responsibility to care for the orphaned, it was a plea for the Church to have the heart that Christ has for the nations. It was a reminder of the incredible work of adoption God has done for each of us who call ourselves sons and daughters of God through the precious blood of our Savior. Because our Heavenly Father lovingly and graciously stoops down to redeem our needy souls, making us heirs with Christ, we too must seek to care for the needy as we seek to emulate our Father’s character.

The entire conference was challenging, but one particular moment took my breath away. Dr. Moore was briefly describing our relationship to the Lord as his children and then paused to address those who wonder how it is they can be called children of a Holy, Perfect, Glorious God–we, who have wallowed in the dirt of sin and rejected our rightful king, we who even after salvation struggle not to delight in the perishing promises of sin. How is it that we can claim the title of his children, that we can claim to be part of his royal family? What is our confidence in? Of course we rightfully point to Christ our great Substitute who lived a perfect life for us and died a horrible death in our place, but what took my breath away in Dr. Moore’s explanation was the way he explained this great truth. It went something like this:

When the enemy asks you, “What makes you think that you are a child of God? You are a sinner, just like every other human on the face of the planet. What makes you think that God would accept you into his family, filthy as you are?” you can confidently reply, “Yes, this is true. I am indeed a sinner just like every other person born from Adam, but every sin that I have ever committed and will ever commit has been paid for. You see, I was put before a judge and found guilty for my sin, I was flogged and beaten, I had a crown of thorns placed on my brow and a mocking purple robe placed on my bloody back, I carried a cross to a hill called Calvary and was nailed to it. I suffered upon that cross and slowly drowned in my own lung fluid. I was mocked, ridiculed and then died for the sins I have committed and have yet to commit. I was rightly punished for my rebellion agains the King of the universe. But that is not where my story ends. You see, after they had placed my in a grave and wrapped me in burial clothes, after there was no hope of resuscitation, life was breathed into my dead body. My hand began to twitch and slowly lifted to my face unwrapping the clothes of death. I stood with new life and left that tomb a justified man, who had paid for his sins. I left that tomb a child of God.”

Sisters, isn’t this the glorious truth of substitution? Isn’t this the miraculous picture of our death and resurrection with Christ?

“Do you not know that all of us who have been baptized into Christ Jesus were baptized into his death? We were buried therefore with him by baptism into death, in order that, just as Christ was raised from the dead by the glory of the Father, we too might walk in newness of life.

 

For if we have been united with him in a death like his, we shall certainly be united with him in a resurrection like his. We know that our old self was crucified with him in order that the body of sin might be brought to nothing, so that we would no longer be enslaved to sin. For one who has died has been set free from sin.

 

Now if we have died with Christ, we believe that we will also live with him. We know that Christ, being raised from the dead, will never die again; death no longer has dominion over him.”
(Romans 6:3-7; Romans 6:8-9 ESV)

We, in no way paid for our own sins, it was completely Christ in every way, but the glorious truth of the gospel is that God counts Christ’s work as our own. He sees us and sees everything that his Son did, his life, his death, and his resurrection are all counted as ours.

“…for in Christ Jesus you are all sons of God, through faith.For as many of you as were baptized into Christ have put on Christ. There is neither Jew nor Greek, there is neither slave nor free, there is no male and female, for you are all one in Christ Jesus. And if you are Christ’s, then you are Abraham’s offspring, heirs according to promise.” (Galatians 3:26; Galatians 3:27-29 ESV)

Praise be to God that our sins are paid for completely and because of Christ we can legitimately be called Sons and Daughters of the Living God. He has adopted us.

“See what kind of love the Father has given to us, that we should be called children of God; and so we are.” (1 John 3:1 ESV)

Not because we were worth it, or because we earned it, but because Christ was worth it and because he earned it. How can we not show the same unconditional love to those around us to need it most?

Win a Copy of Adopted for Life!

Today I am going to offer a giveaway of Russell Moore’s book Adopted for Life (the book this conference was based on). There will be two books up for grabs so there are two chances to win.

One of the most striking purposes in Dr. Moore’s messages was that adoption is not just a family calling, it is the church’s calling. Just because you may not be in a position to adopt, doesn’t mean that you are exempt from the ministry of adoption. For that reason this giveaway should not just be seen as a prize for married couples who are already contemplating adoption, but for every person who belongs to the body of Christ: students, singles, marrieds, and empty nesters. All of us have a responsibility to care for the widow and the orphan. This book will help you understand why and what that practically looks like.

For your chance to win 1 of 2 copies of this book simply fill out the entry form below. The giveaway will end at 12pm on Monday the 20th.

This giveaway is closed.

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Without the knowledge of God’s intense love for me I would be tempted to think him a cruel Sovereign who delights in my suffering. It is his love, the love that sent Christ to calvary, that comforts me even in the darkest of nights. It was his love that guarded my heart as I delivered my lifeless baby girl at 17 weeks, and his love that gives me hope for future healthy pregnancies. This God who is so infinitely powerful is infinitely sensitive. He knows our frame. He knows our needs, our desires, our struggles and he cares deeply about them. He does not desire our harm, but desires our good and this knowledge opens heavens doors and allows us to step into the Holy of Holies. This love that shed the Prince of Light’s blood for my dark, sinful soul. It is God’s love that draws me to him and makes his grace impossible to resist.

Here are some of your answers:

Lauren said…

I have been listening to the cd Attributes of God by Shai Linne (based on AW Pink’s book) ever since we got it two months ago. I think the song on there that hits me the most is the one on God’s amazing patience. “He loves us patiently” the chorus goes. The fact that my God is slow to anger makes Him so different from man–from ME. It challenges me to consider that if I want to demonstrate His patience to others (especially my kiddos!) then I must look to Him and see just how amazingly patient He has been with me. And I am overwhelmed. I’ve also been meditating on the fruit of the Spirit lately, and how that fruit is in line with the character of God. If we want to bear the fruit of the Spirit, we must be depending upon Him and looking to Him to produce His likeness in us. The fact that He does this work in sinners is truly amazing, demonstrating His power, His kindness, His love, His wisdom…It’s hard to meditate on one attribute without it relating to His other perfections!

Becky said…

For me, the attribute of God that has turned my life upside down is His Sovereignty. That He is above all, reigning over all is just incredible. It brings me to my knees, comforts me, and gives me hope when I don’t find a reason for it. God is Sovereign over all… just think about that! That makes me shiver!

Holly said…

I agree with Becky. My favorite attribute of God is His Sovereignty (I think that would be wisdom on the chart). As mothers we tend to be worriers (at least most moms I know are) and knowing and trusting that God is Sovereign over ALL even things I cannot understand is so comforting. It is the ultimate hope for me. This world can have such sad moments that knock the breath out of you and I cannot imagine going through them without knowing God is ordaining it all for His glory and the good of His people.

Please feel free to keep the conversation going and share your favorite attribute in the comments. 

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As Christians, we commonly refer to our salvation as being “born again” into a new life with Christ. This is when our new and true life begins; when God starts an incredible work in us as we grow closer to Him. For me, this work began very early in life as I vividly remember repeating “the prayer” to “ask Jesus into my heart” when I was in elementary school. However, it wasn’t until my early teens when I was struck with the harsh realization that I was indeed a sinner no matter how “good” I thought I was. I believed that I was doing everything right on my own, and surely that was enough to please God. I remember listening to a powerful testimony given by a speaker at a youth camp I attended with my church. His life had been radically transformed by the power of his relationship with Christ, and I longed for my own life to be molded and changed by this amazing love Christ had chosen me to live in. From then on, I threw away the notion that I could earn His favor with the things I could do, and gave it over to the simple truth I had heard over and over and never fully understood. “God demonstrates his own love for us in this: While we were still sinners, Christ died for us” (Rom. 5:8). I suddenly had an overwhelming passion to glorify Him in every way of my new life.

As I began to dig deeper in God’s Word wanting to know more about His plan for my life, I was fascinated in finding that He in fact had a very specific blueprint for women. Knowing the key to living a life glorifying to God (and a future family) was so exciting to me! I have been so blessed to be surrounded later in my spiritual growth by “Proverbs 31 Women” (as we have come to label them!) and even more fortunate that the most influential to me was my own mom. I learned everything about the art of taking care of a home and family from her and witnessed the beauty of sacrifice that comes with blessing her husband and children. From her, I gained the passion to devote my life to becoming a part of this amazing design God has for women.

Among the many things learned from my mom, being wise with your resources became a lesson that stuck with me. Creatively using what you have, turning nothing into something, and working with your hands were not only concepts we lived by, but they became a fun hobby for me as well. Once I learned how to use the sewing machine, well, I soon learned what I wanted to do “when I grew up!” I eventually went to school for Family and Consumer Sciences, or in other words, Home Economics, and also gained my teachers certification. If learning these skills was so fun, I knew teaching would be even more rewarding. Now, I am very fortunate to be teaching high school students (that’s not something you hear every day!) these skills and equipping them with the tools I believe are so very important to our society. Even if most of them think it’s “un cool” or “old fashioned!”  When they eventually realize how valuable they are in their college dorms because they can mend a hem or sew on a button, I tell them to think of me! Even more rewarding than teaching some of these skills to my students, is living out these truths in my life at home, for my husband and future family. I can’t think of anything more natural, exciting, and challenging than striving to be the woman God has designed me to be in the home. I think we can all say this is the true desire of our hearts and that we are very thankful for the wonderful resources blogs like Desiring Virtue provide us with!

Savannah developed a love for all things crafty after her first macaroni necklace in kindergaten. She now shares her pashion for beautiful things with her high school Fashion Design and Interior Design students. She lives with husband Greg in Houston, Texas who (mostly) doesn’t mind the sewing supplies occupying the dinner table… and coffee table… and sometimes half the couch! In their spare time, they love doing anything and everything outdoors and serving in their church’s worship band.

If this is your first time to visit Desiring Virtue you may want to join our growing community of passionate homemakers by "liking" DV on Facebook, following DV on Twitter, or subscribing to DV's email delivery via Feedburner.

Today we celebrate love, which for a Christian is the celebration of God and his wondrous work within us. It is because of his glorious and perfect love toward us that we can show love toward others. Join me today in searching out what the Scriptures say about love. Throughout the day I will be Tweeting beautiful words of love from the Bible. You can follow on Twitter or Facebook.

Also, don’t forget to enter this giveaway for a chance to win one of the three books I recommended on Marriage.

Happy Valentine’s Day!

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“Wives, submit to your own husbands, as to the Lord. For the husband is the head of the wife even as Christ is the head of the church, his body, and is himself its Savior. Now as the church submits to Christ, so also wives should submit in everything to their husbands.

 

Husbands, love your wives, as Christ loved the church and gave himself up for her, that he might sanctify her, having cleansed her by the washing of water with the word, so that he might present the church to himself in splendor, without spot or wrinkle or any such thing, that she might be holy and without blemish. In the same way husbands should love their wives as their own bodies. He who loves his wife loves himself. For no one ever hated his own flesh, but nourishes and cherishes it, just as Christ does the church, because we are members of his body. ‘Therefore a man shall leave his father and mother and hold fast to his wife, and the two shall become one flesh.‘ This mystery is profound, and I am saying that it refers to Christ and the church. However, let each one of you love his wife as himself, and let the wife see that she respects her husband.” (Ephesians 5:22-33)

In this passage, in just a few words, we behold a stunning truth. Here we have a glimpse into the mind of God, with this truth explained we can understand his very motive in creating us man and woman, husband and wife.

The truth is that our roles as husband and wife, and the mystical union (both in flesh and spirit) that takes place as we take our vows, were ordained from eternity past by our Holy God to reflect the glorious acts of Christ.

“…when Paul wanted to tell the Ephesians about marriage, he did not just hunt around for a helpful analogy and suddenly think that “Christ and the church” might be a good teaching illustration. No, it was much more fundamental than that: Paul saw that when God designed the original marriage He already had Christ and the church in mind. This is one of God’s great purposes in marriage: to picture the relationship between Christ and His redeemed people forever!” (George Knight)

This truth is captivating! When Jesus made us heirs of the Living God through his precious blood, he forever grafted us into his own family. In the most perfect way, he married the church-pledging his life, his body, and his future to us. We are his and he is ours. As the wedding ring on my finger testifies to the promise of my earthly marriage, the Holy Spirit within us testifies to the heavenly union we have with our Savior.

If this connection between the marriage relationship and Christ’s relationship to the church is true, it presents many weighty and marvelous implications for our lives. There are two that I have been meditating on recently:

1. Our Marriages are Not About Us.

Marriage is an incredible blessing to a husband and wife, but above all it is meant to bring glory to the Risen Lord. Like so much of scripture, the creation of such a relationship between Adam and Eve was meant to point to Christ’s glorious work on the cross for the redeemed. We can’t miss this truth and hope to fulfill the divine purpose God has for our marriages. How a husband and wife interact on a daily basis either brings glory to the gospel or defiles it because it is meant to be a picture of the gospel. As the redeemed people of God it is our duty and delight to use this remarkable gift to bring glory to his name in all creation.

How do we bring glory to the gospel through our marriages? How do we live the gospel in our marriages? In order to live out the divine purpose of our marriages we must obey the word of God in the callings it has laid out for us. Husbands must love their wives sacrificially, they must lead their wives in a way that mirrors Christ’s leadership of the church. Wives must honor and respect their husbands and submit to them in everything. This kind of relationship is completely counter cultural, but so is the gospel it is meant to represent.

2. Our Marriages are Meant to Be Incredible!

If our marriages are meant to reflect the glorious love between Christ and his church, it stands to reason the love that a husband and wife have for one another has the potential to reach magnificent heights! Our physical and spiritual union with our husbands is nothing short of miraculous. There is something supernatural about it, something that cannot be explained from our finite human minds, something deep, pervasive, unique. Just as Christ miraculously bound himself to the church for her good and his glory, we have entered into a binding relationship for our good and Christ’s glory. Marriage is meant to bring immense pleasure to a husband and wife because of the very nature of what marriage represents.

If this is true, why then do we find ourselves in difficult situations with our spouse? Why do we get into fights or have periods of disunity? Is it as simple as the fact that we are not living out the gospel with each other? If we are not walking in and breathing out the very thing that gives life and meaning to our marriages how can we ever expect for them to blossom and mature into their full potential? We must daily seek out the very thing we are trying to mirror in our relationship. The gospel isn’t just the purpose for our marriages it is the power for our marriages. We cannot bring glory to God on our own. We cannot be the wives he has called us to be without his powerful working in the deepest, darkest parts of our souls. The power of the Risen Lord is the only thing sufficient to make our marriages gospel-bearing vessels worthy of the honor bestowed on them.

What a glorious privilege it is to partake in this mystery that God prepared for us in ages past! What a humbling thought that he purposefully planned to use flawed men and women to physically represent the relationship of Christ and the church. We must beg Christ for the ability to bring glory to his name through this means and we must thank him for the joy to be found in such a mystical union.

For further reading: The Theology of a Helper

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I really like this one that focuses on the Attributes of God. Not only does it show various attributes (different aspects of his character), but it also classifies them into communicable (those attributes that he shares with other beings) and incommunicable (those that are specific to him alone) attributes. You can click on this image to go to a larger one.

This week’s reader feedback question is this:

What is your favorite attribute of God and how does it effect your life as a woman, wife, and/or mother? 

I will share my answer and select five of yours to publish on Thursday! I look forward to hearing your thoughts.

If this is your first time to visit Desiring Virtue you may want to join our growing community of passionate homemakers by "liking" DV on Facebook, following DV on Twitter, or subscribing to DV's email delivery via Feedburner.

There are those who refer to us homemakers as “parasites.”  Or who try to guilt us out of our homes by pointing out how poor we must be making our families by stubbornly refusing to get out there and earn a paycheck.  I’ve seen homemakers firing back with data showing how much a homemaker is worth, how much a family saves by the wife staying home to care for the children and other services rather than having to pay for daycare or household help.  While there’s some validity to these points, I find in my own experience that focusing on the economic issue alone rather misses the point.

Money is not the reason I’m called to keep the home, and I suspect it’s not the primary force that brought anyone into this lifestyle. I know there are some who cannot be full-time homemakers because their family’s circumstances will not allow it (saving up to stay home in the future, disabled spouse, etc..), but as one for whom it is a possibility, I think it’s truly my calling.

When we are instructed to be “working at home, kind, and submissive to our own husbands” in Titus 2, Paul does not tell us that we do this to save money.  This is how we serve God and uphold His word, and the benefits we and our families reap from our homemaking go so far beyond the financial. As a practical matter, instead of each person in the family exerting the bulk of their energies toward meeting someone else’s goals, a home with a homemaker at its center tends to become more of a team. I’m not spending most of my days concerned with helping Law Firm X, but instead with bettering our household.  Likewise, instead of us both coming home and crashing on the couch, I’m starting to notice that things have been changing in my marriage as well.  My husband seems less focused on work as purely “the career,” but also as his calling that allows him to care for our household.  There’s a lot more “we” in this way of ordering things.

More importantly, the benefits of being a homemaker are eternal.  In discussing how we are to live as God’s people, we all know that in the Old Testament, the Proverbs 31 lady is highly praised.  And no wonder – if you read that chapter, she sounds like the CEO of homemaking!  More importantly, if you read that chapter, you see that her work is not just limited to her own pleasure and that of her husband.  Instead her service, in reverence for the Lord, causes her children also to “rise up and call her blessed” (v.28) and as we see in v. 23, her husband is given a place of respect in the community.  Those of you with children are probably also mindful of God’s command in Deuteronomy 6:7 that, “(y)ou shall teach them [God's words] diligently to your children…”  We are charged not with making a happy little cottage that looks like it belongs in a magazine and makes us proud. Our work has a more eternal nature.  Homemaking is a ministry, and we by our actions create a center from which our households can serve God, learn His ways and reach out into the world.  And that legacy of faith from generation to generation has a worth that we might miss if we look at the world only in terms of paychecks.

After several years of trying to balance the management of her home with being a professional woman, Amy is in the process of transitioning home to serve primarily as a homemaker. She now lives with her husband in the Washington DC area where she is enjoying the challenges of figuring out how to make a house a home. Hint: It’s requiring a much broader skill set than she or many other people would have ever dreamed! In her spare time, she enjoys travel, reading, and serving in her church. You can follow her adventures at MakingAJoyfulHome.blogspot.com.

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Nothing says “I love you” like “I want to actively work toward loving your more sincerely, serving you more sacrificially, and honestly growing with you in the likeness of Christ this year.” Isn’t that what we all want for our marriages? Don’t we desire to year after year grow closer, stronger, and more unified as a couple? Don’t we desperately desire for our marriages to draw us closer to the Savior and to reflect him more clearly to a watching world?

Something my husband and I love to do is read books on the subject of marriage. Sometimes we read them together, sometimes we listen to them together (as in the old school audio books), and sometimes when that is not possible, we just read them individually.

The best part about reading a book together (even if you can’t read it at the exact same time) is that you can work together to understand and implement what you have just read. It gives you the opportunity to be intimately involved in the growth of your marriage. It promotes unity by allowing you to see as your spouse sees and allows you to understand what your spouse expects, feels, and desires from your marriage. There is an intimacy that grows as you are together challenged toward greater Christ-likeness and you are forced to speak of things that sometimes you would rather just went unsaid. Reading together is good, because it inevitably leads to talking together and growing together.

Today I would like to share a few of the best books available today that focus on the topic of marriage. These books are all great resources for couples who desire to grow both in their relationship together and in their relationship with the Lord. I would encourage you to make it a point to read at least one of them together this year as you seek to honor the Lord in your marriage. I would encourage you to buy one as a Valentine’s Day Gift for your husband to say:

I want to actively work toward loving your more sincerely, serving you more sacrificially, and honestly growing with you in the likeness of Christ this year.

Three Marriage Books We Highly Recommend:

1.) What Did You Expect?? Redeeming the Realities of Marriage

By Paul David Tripp

Publisher’s Description:

“Marriage, according to Scripture, will always involve two flawed people living with each other in a fallen world. Yet, in pastor Paul Tripp’s professional experience, the majority of couples entermarriage with unrealistic expectations, leaving them unprepared forthe day-to-day realities of married life.

This unique book introduces a biblical and practical approach to those realities that is rooted in God’s faithfulness and Scripture’s teaching on sin and grace. “Spouses need to bereconciled to each other and to God on a daily basis,” Tripp declares. “Since we’re always sinners married to sinners, reconciliation isn’t just the right response in moments of failure. It must be the lifestyle of any healthy marriage.”

What Did You Expect? presents six practical commitments that give shape and momentum to such a lifestyle. These commitments, which include honestly facing sin, weakness, and failure; willingness to change; and embodying Christ’s love, will equip couples to develop a thriving, grace-based marriage in all circumstances and seasons of their relationship.”

Why We Love This Book:

This book is real. It deals with the disillusionment that inevitably comes when we realize that our spouse is not the “perfect” person we thought they were. Rather than coming from a “Here’s how it should be…” approach, Tripp assumes you have come to the point where you see “how it truly is” and then shows you how Christ can heal, grow, and unify your marriage. It helps you to see God’s purpose in putting you together with your spouse and encourages you to practically love one another with the love that has been shown to us through Christ.

“What Did You Expect” is the number one book I recommend these days. I wish that every married person could read it, because it is truly eye opening.

Click here to read more of what I think about this book

2.) When Sinners Say “I do:” Discovering the Power of the Gospel for Marriage

by Dave Harvey

Publisher’s Description:

Marriage is the union of two people who arrive at the altar toting some surprisingly large luggage. Often it gets opened right there on the honeymoon, sometimes it waits for the week after. The Bible calls it sin and understanding its influence can make all the difference for a man and woman who are building a life together. When Sinners Say “I Do” is about encountering the life-transforming power of the gospel in the unpredictable journey of marriage.

Dave’s writing style embraces the reader as he speaks honestly, and sometimes humorously, about sin and the power of the gospel to overcome it. He opens the delightful truth of God s word and encourages the reader to see more clearly the glorious picture of what God does when sinners say “I do.”

Why We Love This Book:

This book focuses on how the gospel effects the way you interact with one another in your marriage. One of the most helpful and encouraging chapters was on dealing with your spouse’s sin where Dave gives some very practical and challenging instructions.

3.) The Meaning of Marriage: Facing the Complexities of Commitment with the Wisdom of God

by Timothy Keller

Publisher’s Description:

There has never been a marriage book like THE MEANING OF MARRIAGE.

Based on the acclaimed sermon series by New York Times bestselling author Timothy Keller, this book shows everyone-Christians, skeptics, singles, long-time married couples, and those about to be engaged-the vision of what marriage should be according to the Bible.

Modern culture would make you believe that everyone has a soul-mate; that romance is the most important part of a successful marriage; that your spouse is there to help you realize your potential; that marriage does not mean forever, but merely for now; that starting over after a divorce is the best solution to seemingly intractable marriage issues. All those modern-day assumptions are, in a word, wrong.

Using the Bible as his guide, coupled with insightful commentary from his wife of thirty-six years, Kathy, Timothy Keller shows that God created marriage to bring us closer to him and to bring us more joy in our lives. It is a glorious relationship that is also the most misunderstood and mysterious. With a clear-eyed understanding of the Bible, and meaningful instruction on how to have a successful marriage, The Meaning of Marriage is essential reading for anyone who wants to know God and love more deeply in this life.

Why We Love This Book:

This book brings the important “God and your marriage” topic to light. It isn’t just about marriage, it is about God and your marriage. Why did God create marriage in the first place? Why does it matter? What are the implications of God’s design for marriage? Why did God create sex and what are the implications of that on our intimacy with one another? These are really important questions and Keller dives right into them in a beautiful, Biblical, and thoughtful way. I will publish a full review of this book in the near future.

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